Rules of The UN
by SwordMasterZ
Summary: Originally known as games the nations are not allowed to play. Sealand discovers the Nations of the UN have some strange rules even stranger is why they exist.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of the board games mentioned. All rights belong to their creators.

A/N: This is supposed to be a segment from a rule book the countries in the UN have, At least as far as my Hetalia head canon is concerned.

Games the Nations of the World are not allowed to Play

Every once in a while the Micro nations get together and have a slumber party. They would usually line up with a world meeting so their older siblings would be reachable in case of an emergency. The world meeting today was being held in Sweden this time around so this meant Sealand was hosting the micro nation slumber party. The Actual slumber party was not supposed to start till around four pm local time so Sealand, Molossia and Hut River were currently sneaking around the meeting hall to see if they can find out what the nations were doing and try to figure out how to get the Nations to recognize them. They did not know where the girls were.

The boys were not able to listen in on the world meeting because the nations were on a lunch break. Molossia decided to go look for America while his older brother had some free time. He saw a large crowd was forming around one of the tables. He walked over to the crowd and found America and Russia at the center of it engaged in what looked like a very heated Chess match.

"Who's winning?" Sealand asked also noticing the game.

It's a stalemate;" Denmark pointed out "Usually whenever they play there is no clear cut winner."

"Comrade looks like it's another draw, Da?" Russia went to shake America's hand but in doing so knocked over his own king, which is an automatic loss.

England looked at China, "That means Russia loses pay up."

"I don't know if this counts. We already called the match." America was holding up a note book that recorded their previous matches. "Looks like we counted it the last five times it happened. Last time I made the mistake. Ivan maybe you should not wear that cote when we play."

"Da"

"Good Game, Same time next week Russia?" America Held out his hand and Russia shook it.

"So are there any games that the members of the UN Do not play." Peter Asked Denmark.

"There is a whole list in the Nations Rule book along with an explanation why?"

"Can I see?"

Denmark pulled the book out of his bag and handed it to Sealand. "Go Crazy?"

Sealand took the book from Denmark and looked at the first page. The book not only said what the Rules of the UN are but which nation added to the book.

 **Rule 1. All nations are required to bring this book to every meeting to have for reference purposes. If you do not have the book on you will be tossed out of the meeting. – Germany**

Sealand looked in the section of the book that pertained to nations getting together for social events and recreation. Most of the rules had to do with the Olympics or the Invictus Games , or the world cup. But there were some rules that were just the countries hanging out. One section was Rules for international Paint Ball. The first two rules were as fallowed:

 **1\. America and Canada cannot be on the same team because that team would have an advantage over their opponent. – Switzerland**

 **2\. The Italy Brothers cannot be on the same team for the opposite reason-Spain**

"Well that is interesting." Sealand flipped a few more pages until he found the desired page.

 **Rules pertaining to Board games**

The Following Section was added by America and myself for no other reason than our own mental Health. This is because more often than not, we have been the ones to deal with the fall out. That is not to say we have not been forbidden from playing a particular games for whatever reason.–Germany

We have also included a reason why the Nations listed are band from playing the Game mentioned to provide Explanation for New UN Members. - America

 **1\. All G-8 Members are band from playing Risk. The Reason for this is they may all take it too seriously and may cause another World War.**

 _Note from Canada: My brother and I are technically allowed to play. We just added ourselves to the list to keep things equal. America also thinks he gets enough war in real life._

 **2\. Prussia, France and Spain are not allowed to play Twister. The Reason They are the Bad Touch Trio, Enough Said.**

 **3\. America and China are not allowed to play Monopoly against each other. Enough of that goes on at the world meetings.**

 **4\. Norway, Britain and Romania cannot force another country into a game of Dungeons and Dragons. We are not saying they cannot play but they have a habit of trying to force us into the Game through magic or other means.**

 _Note from America: This came about after they magically kidnapped me to try to get me to play. I do like this game but I had a meeting with my boss at the time and the kidnapping resulted in my boss having a panic attack. On a Side note the magic trio all got grounded by their Bosses._

 **5\. Russia Is Not allowed to play Operation. You do not want to know the reason here.**

 _Note from Germany: Nine trust me you really don't, shudder_

 **6\. No member of the former Soviet Union is allowed to play 1313 Dead end Drive. The reason for this is the Baltic states were getting Ideas on how to kill Russia**.

 _Note from America and Germany: We both got tired of taking Russia to the Hospital and needing therapy afterwards._

 **7\. Britain, America and Japan are not allowed to pay Battle Ship. All three of them are too good at it and Britain is Insufferable when he wins.**

 **8\. No one is allowed** **to play Jumanji. The game is cursed. How the game came to be we have no Idea. Ok One of The African nations might know but they will not tell us.**

 **9\. Britain is not allowed to play Clue. He always thinks he is Sherlock Holmes and makes it impossible for the rest of us to have fun.**

"Wow there are a lot of games Britten is not allowed to play," Peter said

to himself as he finished reading the list.

That night at the sleep over Sealand was sitting with Molossia and Hut River trying to figure out what to do next the girls were down the hall doing make overs. So what do you guys want to do?

"How about a board game?" Hut River pulled out a game that looked like it was from the Victorian era. "This was in the back of Australia's closet."

Molossia and Sealand Read what on the clearly, antique game _, "Jumanji_."

"I'm in," Molossia said, as Hut River set up the game.

"Guys I don't think we are supposed to play this game," Sealand said as he and Hut River selected some game pieces.

"What are you afraid of? It is just a game." Molossia rolled the dice and the ground began to shake.

The next day Sweden was trying to round up zoo animals and the magic trio was trying to place a protective barrier around the game.

The three micro nations held their heads in shame. As America came up behind them "Germany and I made that rule for a reason. You know."

The three micro nations nodded their heads in shame. All three of them knew while America was the world Super power he did not enforce his authority often and while Germany loved order he did not make Rules without a reason. That being said the Boys learned if one or both of them had a rule against something they had a reason. But long story short never break the Board game Rule.


	2. Chapter 2

America's Country songs Are Not How-to instructions

Disclaimer: I Own Nothing.

Sealand was flipping through the UN Rule book looking through the section on Entertainment when he came Across An interesting entry from Italy of All people.

 **Americas Country songs Are not to be used as a How to book** -Italy

Reason: _England And France_

Sealand wondered about this so when the Nations were on a lunch break he asked Italy about it. The story he heard surprised him.

It turned out that England found France Cheating on him with Spain. This did not surprise Sealand Italy was talking about two-thirds of the bad touch trio, after all. What surprised Sealand was how England reacted.

England did not say anything he just grabbed America's baseball bat and then proceeded to thoroughly destroy France's Car. Once France's tail lights were destroyed England then took out his key's and key the car and carve the name Arthur into the car's leather interior. This went on for about ten minutes before America came and held England in place until he calmed down.

"Iggy, Iggy Stop this will not help Anything." America looked at his former guardian with concern.

"England looked at America half crazed. "Don't tell me to stop you bloody twat! You are the grand high priest over reaction."

"What are you talking about England."

England glared at him. "Let's start with your brake up with Russia and your break up with Japan."

"That is not the same thing and you know it England."

England retaliated by pointing out the got the Idea from one of America's country songs, "Before he Cheats."

America gave him a look "Number one that song is just a song, number two. That car belongs to Germany, they car pooled because Frances car was in the shop.

England then went several shades paler. As Germany glared at him.

America then proceeded to drag England before things got any worse.

The following day England resaved a bill from Germany for the damage to his car.

Sealand looked shocked. England did that?"

Italy nodded. "Si"

Sealand had no response to this he just walked away to see if Molossia was around or as He liked to call himself Kickassia.


	3. Chapter 3

Rules for American Thanks Giving

Disclaimer: I own Nothing

Authors: Note Besides the states and territories, Let's assume The G-8 and The Nordics are on the guest list every year as well as Spain so I do not have to list every guest at the party.

 **Do not Touch The Pie!**

To all The nations who ever shared Thanks Giving with America Three things were unspoken among the Nations. One was America's States and Territory's made the house crazy. The second thing was despite being raised by England America was a descent cook. The third was an unwritten rule and That was no one goes near the pie until it is served.

Nobody Bothered to tell Sealand That however, who was sneaking around the kitchen trying to avoid the thirteen, who were helping America cook different portions of the meal. Massachusetts had made several seafood dishes and was overseeing the prep of some personal meat pies that apparently had dear meat in them. Sealand avoided her as she grabbed a tray of scalps and walked out the dour next he avoid Virginia as he was pulling several types of potatoes out of the oven and started slicing the ham.

As Sealand got closer to his goal Canada And America Came in to carve Several different Birds. As the rest of America's Oldest kids brought out the rest of the side dishes. They did not seem to notice The Micro nation as He edged closer to the Pie.

"So Mexico Didn't show Alfred." Canada was shaking his head.

"It's Complicated Bro but I do not blame our sister at the moment. However, I have my hands full Trying to convince/ Reassure Alaska That I am not getting back together with Russia. Also Porta Rico is still upstairs sick in bed because well. You know."

Canada shook his head "Sorry."

"It's not your fault. America fixed up a tray with some soup one of the personal meat pies from earlier. I'm taking this tray upstairs to see if I can get Porta Rico to eat something can you finish carving the birds for me."

"Sure, hopefully he will be able to hold it down this time."

"That's why I'm starting with something small bro if he holds this down I'll bring him something ells."

Sealand had managed to grab one of the apple pies and was about to sneak out of the kitchen but he tripped on he tripped and went crashing into America who dropped the tray spilling hot soup on himself. This caused him to fall backwards into the stack of pies.

Pie went flying every were.

Canada checked to make sure his brother was ok before he brought the turkey out to the main room.

Germany heard the commotion in the kitchen and was about to get up to check on America when Canada came out f the kitchen.

"I have some bade news there is no pie this year people."

"What Happened?" England asked.

Before Canada could answer America Came out of the Kitchen dragging Sealand behind him and dripping fruit filling off his close and hair. "Tell them what happened squirt."

"Sealand gulped. "My fault, I tried to steal one and they all came crashing down."

"No pie!?" The Italy twins looked ready to faint.

"Well we have cookies at least." America whipped pie filling out of his eyes.

"He still needs to be Punished," England put in

"After America cleaned the pie goo off himself and brought food up to his sick territory the rest of America's family and guests sat down to dinner. After which Sealand had to clean the kitchen Under Germany's supervision who mad the micronation clean up the mess with a toothbrush.

That was the day Sealand learned do not touch the pie until its time.


	4. Chapter 4

Do not mess with a Nation's National Animal

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N this is inspired by A thing that actually happened look up Man Vs. Panda on Youtube.

Sealand was hanging around a zoo in China waiting for the other Micronations to show up. He was sitting near the Panda enclosure, when he saw Prussia and Canada near the entrance. He was just close enough to make out what they were saying.

"I'm going to do it Birdy get the camera ready." Prussia was beginning to climb over the fence and into the enclosure.

"Please don't Gilbert the panda is sleeping peacefully. Leave it alone." Canada looked like he was actually trying to make himself invisible for once.

Sealand could plainly see that the panda was indeed sleeping peacefully and decided no matter what happened he was on the panda's side. He also thought he remembered something in the UN Rule Book about messing with another nations national animal but he assumed it was because in some cases like America and China the animal was endangered. In any event Sealand decided to see what would happen.

Prussia was slowly working his way over to the sleeping Panda and began to poke at it. "See Birdy nothing to –"

No sooner had Prussia turned his back the panda woke up and started to wrestle him to the ground. Prussia then attempted to get away but ripped his pants in the process. Once he got over the fence he noticed that Canada had succeeded in making himself invisible to everyone ells around him.

Prussia's misery did not end their however because as soon as he got away from the crowed China dropped out of a nearby tree and hit Prussia in he face with what the other nation's referred to as the wok of shame.

Sealand could her China yelling at Prussia the whole time. "What are you doing to Panda!"

Sealand got the whole thing on tape and emailed it to Germany who in a rare moment of humor / immaturity posted it to his Youtube account. The video went viral in the first hour. Prussia could not show himself in public for the next two weeks.

On that day Sealand learned another reason why you do not mess with another nations national animal and he was wondering what would have happened if he had gone after Canada's Polar Bears.


End file.
